Don't Bruise My Apples

  The other day I bought a bag of apples at the store. As the cashier placed them with "great force' into the grocery bag, I felt my eyes bug out of my head. Really. The thought crossed my mind, "Does she not know that apples bruise?" I quickly gained a smiling face once I realized I probably had a sour look upon me. I mean, it is just apples. Not the end of the world, Jade. 

 For some reason after we left, I started thinking about that situation again. I started thinking about my Christian family and how sometimes we do things to each other that causes bruises to one another. I try to tell myself that these things are not intentional. That they were just having a bad day or whatever. Sometimes, it may just be that they are going through something themselves.  Who knows. I know I have unintentionally hurt others when I had personal things going on in my life. I just didn't realize it was hurting anyone else.

 When I thought about all of this, I thought about how God must think when we "bruise" his children, our brothers and sisters. I know he is displeased. 

 Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me. What a lie that is. Ask that couple that has left the church because of people bashing them. Ask that teenager that does not want to go to Bible class because of all of the kids whispering around them. Ask that woman that does not want to go to lunch with everyone else because "She" will be there. You know, the friend that talked about her behind her back. The one she trusted. 

 Some would say that these people just need a backbone. In some cases you are right. I say we need to stop "bruising" our fellow brothers and sisters in Christ. Then, they wouldn't have to have a stronger backbone. They would trust more, fellowship more and love one another more. Isn't that what Christians are to do anyway? 

 So the next time the thought crosses your mind to call up "Jane" and tell her everything you know, or you think you know, about 'Sally". Stop. Think. Is this going to benefit or "bruise' my sister in Christ that God has given me to love, respect and protect. 

 Souls are far more important than apples. 

GET REAL! 

 

 

 

The situation

 A few weeks ago, I learned of a situation that has really made me come to grips with some things.

 A friend of mine said something about me, that really just broke my heart.

 Of course my initial reaction was anger, which really just stemmed from being hurt.

 The more I have prayed about it, and the more I have studied about it, I have come to peace with it. Sure, we never want someone to talk behind our backs, especially our friends. As we all know, this unfortunately is going to happen.

 When it does, I have choices I can make. These are the three I chose to write about.

1) Be aggressive and "go after" her. ( Which would only hurt you in the long run.)

2)  Be passive aggressive and talk to EVERYONE else about it but her, bashing her name in the process.  Proverbs 17:9 Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.

3) Forgive.

 Now, I will say this. Being in a situation like this is very hard for me. These are my friends. These are people that I trust (as much as I can) and these are people that I love.  I hate when things like this happen. I question myself and the person that I am. (I think we all do.) I have to tell myself that I can not control her actions. Only mine.

 I also had to ask myself if what she said was true. To my knowledge it was not. It was an opinion. It did take me a long time to accept that. I do not like people having issues with who I am. As much as I know how imperfect I am, for some reason, I feel like there should not be anyone that sees me that way. Yeah, yeah. Get over yourself!

 For some reason, one little statement can cause us to question our whole self worth. Don't let that happen. If you do have a question of whether or not you are what they say you are, ask an honest friend about your personality. I have a friend I'm going to refer to as "Honest". If you do not want to know about the true YOU, do not ask her. Ha Ha.

 Some people would take offense to her honesty but, I have tried to use it to my advantage of bettering myself. For instance, I asked her once what my flaws were....... she gave me three answers. By the way, I have more than three flaws. She was just being nice!

 One of them was that I stay on my phone too much when I am in the company of others. Truth.  I stay on my phone too much when I'm by myself! (Which was something I always hated when the teenagers were at my house, I used to threaten to take them away, in fact I may have a time or two. Or three!)

 Anyway, I have tried to fix that. Still working on it.

 Point being, It is good to have those kinds of friends!

 Only if you can handle and accept truth! Do not take offense to her answer if you ask your "honest" friend that question though. I mean, you did ask. Use it to better yourself if it is something you feel like would make you a better friend, wife, mom, co-worker, person in general.

 Back to the situation: I'm over it. Done. Over. Gone. Moving On.

 I have been wanting to write about it since I learned of it. I realized my heart was not in the right place at the time to do so.  I know as Christians we struggle sometimes to 'let go" of things. I have learned that over time, holding hurt feelings in our hearts only hurts you. Most of the time, the other person isn't even thinking about you! For some reason, we always think they are. Nope.

 I hope reading this, you will realize that overcoming hurt feelings is a gift to yourself. I like gifts!  It unlocks a sense of freedom that only you hold the key to.

 So what if you were wronged, so what if they are "your friend" and it hurt you.

 Think about your relationship with your husband. Does he love you? Has he ever unintentionally hurt you? In my life the answer to those questions is yes. And, B is my best friend. He has hurt my feelings and it was unintentionally. I know that he loves me with all of his heart and that I am the best thing in his life EVER though! HAHA!

 You have to realize that every relationship will not be perfect and realize that you also have wronged others unintentionally.

 Moral of the story:
1) Forgive
2) Find an "honest" in your life
3) Better yourself
4) Give yourself this gift today

1 Peter 1:3 Above all, keep loving one another earnestly since love covers a multitude of sins.